Wednesday, March 22, 2017

Shoulder Doctor....Duck!!!!

The update from my visit today to the ortho guy!!
See my new plastic and metal shoulder joint with a bar down the arm to stabilize it!!!
No wonder it hurt so much.
Doc  was thrilled at the perfect 3 week progress of my surgery.

Not so much this victim of unrealistic expectations.
My arm is no longer in a sling.
I am no longer on narcotic pain meds.

I can drive with one arm.
I cannot use this arm to lift anything heavier than a teacup.
I cannot turn the arm out..or do this or that.
I cannot quilt and I cannot lift a quilt.
I may possibly be able to piece.
I cannot use the rotary cutter
For six weeks..For six more weeks.
I cannot go to the pool for six more weeks.
I must not fall...

Because I must use the cane for my right hip that has not been replaced yet..
I cannot use it with my left hand...that leaves my purse and cane in my right hand.
Still figuring out how to do grocery shopping, etc.
Still figuring out how to make my purse the weight of a teacup.
I must be aware that I am a fall risk.

There are range of motion exercises for me to my arm as far as it will go
10 times myself and have someone else do that 10 times once a day.
Doctor does not believe in PT for this kind of surgery
He says it can often be too harsh and displace his good work. we are...
No quilt pictures...
Surgery success and my attitude is being adjusted!!!..


Monday, March 20, 2017

In a Fabric Muddle

A post I started without energy to publish.
That day.....
The lovely snowy day with bright sun and Carolina blue skies
The snow that started at 3am...enough for the cousins to get a picture.
By one pm it was totally gone.

My girl left that morning in a white Lyft car in the snow
She met her man in Seattle and headed out for tin whistle sessions. 
They have chosen Portland, Oregon over Seattle for the COL and the charm.
I had some tears but mostly I am empowered by her visit

I have not heard from our Bea in two months
That does not bode well for  her lung cancer diagnosis.
Bea, I so miss chatting with you.

Now a thought on fabric.  My collection spans 50 years,
Why...because I love it so.  I keep it all but what I give to friends.
Looking at it takes me back to where I bought it and when.
It takes me back to wonderful memories...Of my travels and Mae's discount fabric in Miami.
Of my friends I have sewn with over the years, of my grandmother.
I love to pat it, organize it, cut it, sew it and admire it.
Home bound with shoulder recovery, I have had a lot
of time to think about life, about,fabric, about, age and such.

I have not been able to throw myself into sewing. My shoulder forbids. it.
 My beautiful collection just sits to be admired.
Part of the problem is that I still struggle with cutting into my favorites... I have a lot of favorites.
I wonder now at my age how it will all go down.
Will I still have a chance to cut my favorites?
I know that I have enjoyed my stash.
My fabric has been an anchor when all else seemed to be gone.
Quilting is my meditation.
Just thinking now...when I heal, will I look at it with different eyes.?.
Me think I should put it in my will...
. I have enjoyed my fabric soooo much without cutting it...
My daughter and sister and fabric friends should take it and love it too.
 They can cut it all up for quilts to make people happy or,
they too can just admire it!!!

Saturday, March 18, 2017

Mrs. O'Quilts Turns a New Leaf!

Guess what?  I sewed tonight, just a little.
I put one border on three potholders in progress.
Joy is in my heart.
Reminding me, of course of when I impatiently called the doctor 3 days after the operation, to complain, ..The message was: " The doc said 3 weeks, not three days"

I am back!  Not all the way....but back.
Almost 3 weeks in recovery...feeling better but so impatient!!!
Besides whining in dismay and pain the past 3 weeks, isolated and unable to drive or go out...
I have finished 10 CEU's online toward renewing my license
Learning from my dear man.  I took the tests right away before studying the lecture material.
AND, out of 10 one hour credits.  I passed 8 of them without studying...right off the bat!
Now did that make me feel good...OH, Yeah!!

Did I want to do this?
Did I want  to exercise self-discipline????
Oh, no......
I wanted to go out shopping
I wanted to go out to eat.
I wanted to be pain free.
I wanted to run in the wind.
I wanted to sew.
I wanted to write a blog post.
I wanted to dance with my man.
I wanted to be 40 again.
But, life made me do the self-discipline thing instead.

Thanks to Muggs, I have been reading!!
A great book.
I have partied....Yup...partied...But the parties came to me
Here I am at Margaret's bday party at last Wednesday night quilters.
Birthday parties on Wednesday nights are getting quite  clever.
Look at the apron that Muggs made Margaret!!
Look at the quilt that Drenna is making for Margaret.
Even though the quality of this picture is poor, you can see the bag with the picture of our group on retreat....made at Shutterfly, by Muggs and her mother..below..other Margaret!
Such great ideas!
Here is a card of get well from my Queen Bee group:
I was flattered, but somehow I only wish I was a Tough Cookie.
Then there was St Paddy's Day and my lost love.
I could not celebrate..
The day was dark....the night was light
as 18 of my widow group came to my house to ease my pain
and celebrate the holiday.
Let me tell you....I am one lucky Mrs. O'Quilts.

Tonight I am having a peaceful, easy evening alone
as the darlings are having supervised/unsupervised visitation with both parents.
This was Himself planning the music for the parade in 2011
You do understand, that this was only yesterday.
After all this time recovering...I have missed my blogging friends..
The leaf has started turning. It is a wonderful thing..
PTSD and Caregiving

Saturday, March 11, 2017

Coming Out of the Dark

Love says:....
Enjoy porch time with Boo and Stitch
 Flowers sent for Emily's birthday, from her husband.

 A darling gift for Lynsey, quilt and doll made by Mary Jerz

Hola friends....I decided to post because the above song was stealing my serenity.
At least now, I can type with both hands.
Either this shoulder replacement was dreadful....or..
I am impatient and over sensitive...or
St Paddy's Day and Easter  and Fintan's two year anniversary of his death are all about here,
or, it is because my girl is leaving tomorrow..
In the middle of nurture and indulgence, I am having break-thru pain in all areas.
My shoulder has a 10 inch cut with stitches and my arm is in a sling.
I cannot drive until the 22nd.
Today is day 11 post- surgery.  It feels like a million years!!
Life goes on around me...but I have not been able to see the light.
I cannot sew. That should say it all!!!
Love comes in the persona of my daughter
She has nurtured me, cared for me...organized me and spoiled me..
I could not have done it without her.
I am such a lucky lady.
She makes meals:
She does the doctoring and the PT and tucks me into bed at night.
She has organized some sewing things for me..
Early tomorrow morning, she leaves for her new chosen city, Portland, Oregon.

Friends sent presents and food.

I am better...ten more days until I am released from the sling and drive and live again.
This is the first day of typing so I am going to stop.
Thank you for all the emails and comments wishing me well.
I am praying that this operation was a success,

Saturday, March 4, 2017

Day Five after the Shoulder Operation....Looking for a "shoulder" song

Cannot type with my left hand
Cannot find an appropriate Shoulder song
Put Your Head on My Shoulders

Let me tell you about Hope
Let me tell you about my daughter
Let me tell you about my friends.

The doctor said the operation went perfectly.
His PA said it would  hurt for 3 weeks.
If I behave, I am pain free.
If I do not behave...AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Just so you know....My girl is a gift to be here with me.

LOOK how much my friends help me out!!!!
A Big Thanks to Eithne!!!!

Thursday, February 23, 2017

My Blog/ My Life

My New Year's resolution every year is to:
..Try new things...
But,.nothing changes...I like safe. I am no longer an adventurer..

Rhonda got sick...cancer...brain...not safe...not good.
Rhonda is queen of good and queen of nice.
So not fair..diseases like  .Cancer or ALS or Parkinson's or MS,or more.
Rhonda asked our group to make her Hedgehog blocks for her future grandchildren.
We are all on it....we love Rhonda.

In quilting, that meant try something this block.
It was hard the first time...the second time was easier.
I made the same mistake both times with the ears...
It is OK...I love the block and love that I was pushed to try something new.
I am showing the finished lovely among the mess in my house..
It does not matter, not a priority.
I can choose to look at the mess or I can choose to look at the darling hedgehog.
My see...choice.

Soft, furry and gentle.

At 22 months a widow, I have chronicled my grief in notes and here on the blog.
It has taken me this long to change my prayer.

My former prayer:
Do not go gently into this good night...

The one I use now:
The Serenity Prayer

Walking through the fire to get to the other side.
Growth from pain.
Growth from mistakes..
Growth from giving to others.
Not giving up.
It has taken me a long long time to relinquish the control that I really never had.
I am still in pain...emotionally and physically.
However, now...I realize that I am not alone.

A big thanks to my many peeps that have stayed by me and my moan.
I am grateful to all  of you.
A special thanks to my friend Rhonda for stretching my limits in many ways.

Wednesday, February 22, 2017

The Short Fuse on the Long Day

The good note...
Elizabeth Hartman's Hazel the Hedgehog block
  Here is mine...made for our Rhonda.
 Starting the second one for Rhonda..just love a yellow face:)
Poor Lynsey...the FLU!!!!  Despite having had the flu shot.
Headache....high fever...lethargy...cough...etc..
We are all wearing masks and washing our hands.
TBTG she is feeling better...pray none of the rest of us gets it.
 The very cool Shutterfly photo book Aunt Emily gave her for her 8th birthday.
Lynsey and her Muldoon family.
 An apron from the 50's or 60's
Apple green....just love that color.

Briefly......cough.. short cough..
Went to  my pre-op...and passed.
Monday the 27th, this bionic women gets an entirely new left shoulder..
Was called by two teachers about Evan's behavior.
Took away the X-Box  until the grades improve.
Suffered through terrible 11 and a half year old middle school snotty  mouth
took Evan for his last DVP??shot.
Called my peeps for moral support

DIL in ER tonight for possible problem with appendix.

Getting fatter everyday from stress!!
However...the Sarge shows up tomorrow night from Seattle.
I am so grateful for a daughter who loves me so.

So sad that so many of my blogging friends have switched to Instagram.
So impersonal...I am being brave..

Monday, February 20, 2017

For the Love of......

For the love of Rhonda...
Just loving to make her block.
For the love of patchwork and quilting addiction.
Aunt Geraldine vowed to the world that she would never ever be a patchwork quilter..
She is hand patching in her own way...TBTG
So glad that the quilt police have long retired...
My visitors have moved on to Florida.
Leaving me so grateful that my dear man's family still is here for us.
Thank you Declan for doing work around here....Thank you so much.
Thank you both for the visit...I cannot believe that you left the French Alps
Drove to Geneva, flew to Stockholm, then to NYC and down to Charlotte to visit us.
Love for sure.
For the love of visitation day....My son was in awesome shape..
.Everyone had a delightful time at the park, in the sun with the picnic...
Enjoying each other.
My son is no longer homeless.
Just for today, he has a place to stay,  a job, a sponsor and a program.
For the love of Carolina Blue..and Grandma having an attitude adjustment...
Just for today.
Ironing her scraps on the porch..
For the love of Ellen and her collections and sales.
For her love of us...
My newest acquisition
Feedsack quilt top in excellent condition..
I love it so.

For the love of good friends...
Thank you MP for taking us all out to eat.

For the love of animals.
My sister took her 19 year old cat to be put down.
He had been hiding and in pain
Waiting for the vet, dear Tiger died in her arms.

For the love of kindness and encouragement..
and, of course self - discipline...ouch...a huge deficit of mine.
Today, I accomplished a bit.
I read a daily reading, sewed a bit for others, ate healthy and...
Had an attitude adjustment....Oh, Lordy!!!!
Amn't I a good Grandma!

Saturday, February 18, 2017

Mush and Mash and Sun Peaking Out

The latest quilting convert!!!!
From across the pond...Irish in France comes part of the....
 Muldoon European connection!!
Yeah!! Geraldine....
Let's get going Ita!!!!
 Hand piecing
A present here...with a piece of Guatemalan fabric from Nancy's house.
A pantry plastic bag holder for my Guatemalan neighbor..
OMG  Look at the European packaging for cigarettes...OMG
A different health picture on each package.
This one...Geraldine's Marlboro...package..
I never saw anything like it.
The entire package is made up of warning...

Protest...part of the way America works...
The Artful American Protest

So Happy Valentine's Day!!
The Way You Look Tonight

It  has been a rough few days..., the sun came out..

Irish visitors brought both sad and glad.
My dear man's family.
They did not forget!!!
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Saturday, February 11, 2017

Suck it up Buttercup ..again....

Cats are fickle.
the minute Pumpkin died, Tigger was in her basket.
Now...Stitch, not missing either Pumpkin, nor Tigger..settles in....really???
One more time at the "estate" kinda sale.
This little tea cup planter is a thank you present...I love it.
 A swatch inside of one of the packages...good to keep for dating fabric.
Marked 1932
 A nice piece...What to do with it??
 This piece was stained...terrible  bleeding.
I soaked it in Retayne forever...It is not all out..but so much better.
What to do with it??

Lordy, Lordy..the darlings have left for three days....I am so happy to have some free time.
 The minute they left, I cried,
..all stymied and stuck, missing them already.
Someone told me to get a grip.
I did not want to hear that.  I wanted a rescue..
Alas, none of that...

But, getting annoyed got me going
I started on my projects....nothing like getting your panties in a twist to be productive.
It has taken all day today to feel myself...guess that the survival adrenaline has worn off..
I realize that as much as I love them., I need a complete break from my darlings..3 days is awesome.
Working hard now to find the new me.
Look, see Ms. O'Quilts organize three whole shelves!!....
A picture of Drenna's shower gift..a bib and burp cloth. fun.  Another post showed a matching quilt.
Today...winter in Charlotte...70 degrees.
Top of the track.  From up here the sky is so clear.

Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Me and the Hulk...a disarming relationship

Nancy's quilt top..king awesome is this!!!!!
Just gotta see a lovely quilt cuzz
The Hulk roller coaster portrays....The life of Mrs. O'Quilts.
Grief in a nutshell...Mood swings...
Up and down I go...even at 21 months out..
Today..Bad:  One kid sick..stayed home from school...old grandma up several times in the night.
Good:  My niece came over to help out. Child all better now.

Good; Lunch out with a charming refreshing and uplifting.

Good and Bad..Doctor's visit...x-ray shows that my fall two weeks ago may have produced a compressed disk.
Good news is in 8 weeks it should fix itself.

Bad... Down...way down..:
Tigger said his goodbyes tonight.
Both Evan and I cried.

Tigger had a nose cancer and other things...  13 seems young..but that is life.
Good:  My Wednesday night quilting group.
They are so much fun.  So good to  me.
We had great fun showing off our sale fabric from another quilter's sale

Since my arthritis has quickly progressed, I am unstable on my feet
So off to the internet to start my cane collection..
the flask cane

It is good to visit with other grieving friends...laughing and crying together.
It is tough to see pain in someone else's eyes.
We are all struggling.
Now, I am struggling to find hope for myself.
I am frightened by my declining ortho health and balance.
I am lifted up by friends.
They are rooting for me not to go down..

Sunday, February 5, 2017

Value, Values...and Such

The supervisor:
Our Stitch always did like purple!!!

Voila...King Value!!!!!
I got the hues last night...I chose one, but couldn't secure value.
Here it is...what a difference..

 Question...Do you think this can be gifted to a child???
  Or is it a bit too harsh.?
I am not sure....I just do not like the Anna Marie jelly roll here...

Next, the Disappearing 9 patch in lovely 30's fabric.
I want the final border here red, but I do not want to buy anything.
Grumble...every year the fabric tint is just different
This makes my collection of 50 years so amazing.
I knew I should not use my fabric..That is why my red 30's is gone!!!
Fabric is a collection to gaze upon and love!!

Do you think either of these would work..or do I have to keep the 30's fabric...?
The tint is off...but really...who cares??
Many fine quilts have fabric of mixed years and tints.
Why I care about this one, I do not know..
I do like the daisys...
Maybe I have  nothing else to worry about tonight....LOL

In the last few hours 4 Ibuprofen..kicked in and my pain is under control..
Wahoooooo!  Funny how the Hydrocodone did not  help me here with the muscle spasms.
I am good to go.
Thank goodness, as our group is off to Foust and lunch tomorrow!
Those of us with good hair days, that is...
Last night's post was not for compliments.  
It was a grief thing. 
 That with grief sometimes there is cognitive the sorrow comes roaring.
With me, when I feel friendless and alone...It is because of my dear man no longer being here.
Although I have many friends...including all of you.
Not one can fix my loneliness for my man
The morning light usually brings perspective.
I sooo  thank you all for reading my blah blah.
It helps me so much.
Good news again today with my son...
Another wonderful visit with his kids and his mother.
God is blessing us.